Etiquette: The Basics

1 months ago

Hello my lovely flowers! So, because I'm a really random and unorganized person, today I decided to interrupt (not end!) my Hawaiian series and start a new series of etiquette-related posts which where an Idea of a loyal reader, Mydoll_Norma, because...I simple feel like writing it, honestly. She suggested that it would be a great Idea if I talked about etiquette, specially because today we live in a world where we do as we please and we forget our manners.

Personally, it was always a subject that fascinated me, so this should be fun. May I remind you that everything from this point forward is in NO WAY my own invention and are simply tips collected from years of learning the art of behaving.

Many people hear or read this French word etiquette and think, "Oh it's that bunch of rules that snobby people follow to make themselves feel superior." WRONG!

Etiquette is a life code, a gathering of social norms to help us behave properly in more formal situations (for example, at a job interview, work meeting, tea time, gala dinner or really just at home with guests). May I also remind you that etiquette is for everyone who feels they want to be more educated and polite and portray a better image of themselves to the world. Manners matter and they should be used every day. 

Manners are the base of our society. A simple "thank you" and "good morning" costs you nothing and can make other people's day better. It's not a good thing to be standing 8 hours of one's day behind a cash register attending to rude customers. Etiquette beggins with ourselves, and today's best examples are public figures such as the Duchess of Cambridge, or Crown Princess Mary of Denmark, simply because royals are the first and best example we think of when it comes to acting politely in public.

First, our posture. in every means of communication that teaches etiquette, everyone will tell you that you should always sit straight with the back completely vertical and your shoulders back. It not only helps your back, it also makes a lot of difference on how people see you. Sitting in a slumpy position is bad for your back and could portray an image of having a lack of manners.

Also while sitting, if you're a woman, you should never in any public place cross your legs. Instead, try the "Duchess Slant" which means to position your joint legs bent to the side. Or, if more confortable for you, just tuck the foot behind the other like in the "Cambridge Cross" or be as simple as joining both legs in front. All these positions are considered proper. This part may not be used much anymore, but hands should rest on top of one another on the lap, or if there's a table, you may rest your forearms on the edge on it, not on top of the table! Elbows should always stay off the table!

If you are a man, you may want to cross your legs. Many businessmen do it. If you don't feel confortable crossing the legs, try crossing the feet in front, or just place one another together. As for the hands, interlocking the fingers of each hand and placing them on your lap is very smart. If by a table, you can place the hands on it, but put the elbows out.

For both women and men, crossing your arms can be seen as being grumpy or bored and will subconsciously tell people you don't want to engage on a conversation, rather than being seen as confident as you might have firstly thought it suggested.

If standing for too long, don't rest with your shoulder or lower back on the wall. You could instead search for a railing or a table and place your arm on it and discreetely lean against it.

While in a group of people, avoid constant eye contact (it can be disturbing for some people) but at the same time, don't always look away or down, it is rude. Try to balance it. Oh, and that reminds me, under NO circumstance should you pay attention to your phone rather than another person. That is beyond rude. That person is spending time to be with you, so do everyone a favor and value it. Being on your phone is only acceptable if you're worried about a loved one's call or waiting for news.

I hope you all liked my new post and if yes, thank you, and get ready learn how to be polite at the table next! ♥